Bad is not an absolute, but a relative term. Ask the robber who used the cash he stole to feed his infant; the rapist who was sexually abused as a child; the kidnapper who truly believed he was saving a life. And just because you break the law doesn't mean you have intentionally crossed the line into evil. Sometimes the line creeps up on you, and before you know it, you're standing on the other side.
I've not been writing much lately, I keep putting everything off and busyness is just an excuse. Well maybe not entirely so, I've been caught up with work, friends, relationships and you could throw in some health issues too. The sleepover was rad and although I made a fool outta myself that night, I had shitloads of fun. There were no pictures but only videos and I can't even bear to listen to myself ... I just want all of it to be locked away in a treasure chest and to be thrown into the deep sea where the six gills live. Oh well. It's 1.32am and I'm wide awake. I know I'm not alone as everyone's online, so that makes me feel kinda normal. Frankly writing about the mundane things in my life have long lost its appeal to me. However I'm not caring since there's absolutely nothing interesting now. I'm ill and it feels great. You know when you're ill you kinda love the caring and the concern people shower you with. That's why I love being sick, bad thing is, you feel really really restless and you just hurt all over.
This is beautifulll
" No, idiot. I wasn't disgusted with her, I was afraid. At that moment, I felt small, like - like I'd lacked experience, like I'd never be on her level, like I'd never be enough for her or something like that, you know what I'm saying? But, what I did not get, she didn't care. She wasn't looking for that guy anymore. She was - she was looking for me, for - for the Bob. But, uh, by the time I figure this all out, it was too late, man. She moved on, & all I had to show for it was some foolish pride, which then gave way to regret. She was the girl, I know that now. But, I pushed her away. So I've spent every day since then chasing Amy... so to speak. "
Twenty minutes later and I still can't find anything interesting. I think I should hit the sack. zzz Life's so boring.
So uh, been a busy bee. TGIF tomorrow's gonna be a tiring day. Heading to town with Abbs and Hira then to support Benjamin with the others, midnight movie gosh I feel like backing out cause it's paranormal activity and then I'm heading to Nikkos' for a sleepover and drinking session with the others. I need loads of resttt. Oh and yea I'm getting skate shoes, which is betterrr, suggestions? My moods have been fluctuating lately ... it's either i get real upset or the other way round. I feel that I've aged greatly. It's like 10 years of my life have already been taken away from me. School, work, school, work urgh and it goes on and on and on yakyakyak.
Have you ever realized how scary life is? I mean, you simply don't know what's going to happen to you. Are you going to live 'till you're a hundred years old? Are you gonna have a big, happy family with ten kids? Are you gonna discover something that will change the world? Are you gonna die a nice, peaceful death in your sleep? Will you die of cancer, or some other sickness or are you gonna die tomorrow in a car accident? Your life isn't like some predictable movie, where you can figure out what's going to happen in the end. Life is a scary thing. So why isn't the whole world freaking out? Because we're all dealing with the same problem. I hope everyone's doing fine. xx
I wanted to upload some overdued photos as Nikko finally tagged me in em with the others but I realized that I look fugly in every single picture. God who took em!!!
This is really demoralizing. See how broken I am? I wish you could fucking feel my pain. Fucking leave me alone.
I’ve learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow. I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he or she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights. I’ve learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you’ll miss them when they’re gone from your life. I’ve learned that making a "living" is not the same thing as making a "life." I’ve learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance. I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw something back. I’ve learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision. I’ve learned that even when I have pains, I don’t have to be one. I’ve learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back. I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn. I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. <3
People think dreams aren't real just because they aren't made of matter, of particles. Dreams are real. But they are made of viewpoints, of images, of memories and puns and lost hopes.
Sometimes you fall, spinning through space, grasping for the things that keep you on this earth. Sometimes you catch them. They can be the hands of the people you love. They can be your pets- pups with funny names, cats with ferocious old souls. The thing that keeps you here can be your art. It can be things you have collected and invested with a certain sense of meaning. A flowered, buckled treasure chest of secrets. Shoes that make you taller and, therefore, closer to the heavens. A suit that belonged to your fairy godmother. A dress that makes you feel a little like the Goddess herself. Sometimes you keep falling; you don't catch anything. Sometimes you fall, spinning through space, grasping for the things that keep you here. Sometimes you catch them, sometimes you don't. Sometimes, they catch you.
Damn i think I should get out. I should have mind blowing sex with a hottie. And I should really stop fucking myself around.
True
God who took em!!! 
